In the magical world known as ‘television’ it is generally accepted that, not only can a single woman be neither happy nor truly successful, the breadth of her unhappiness is also in direct proportion to that of her other achievements. The more beautiful, intelligent and educated the Sad Singleton woman of television is, the more desperately she will hoe into her triple choc fudge gallon of ice cream as she weeps over jewellery shopping channels while clutching the empty territory of her useless womb.
Of course, everyone with taste knows that the most interesting female characters to watch on TV are the ones who don’t spend every episode actively hating themselves. Here are five such badass dames of the small screen for you to fall in love with (if you haven’t already).
As Donna Meagle would say, “Treat yo’self!”
1. Donna from Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation’s Donna Meagle (Retta) is without a doubt the bitchinest broad in all of Pawnee. She’s big, she’s beautiful and she can ‘geeeeet it’. In Season 4’s ‘Pawnee Rangers’, we learn that Donna and Tom (Aziz Ansari) enjoy an annual ‘Treat Yo Self’ fiesta where they buy whatever they want for an entire day just to celebrate the excellence that is them. Donna takes her possessions very seriously, a fact everyone learns when someone accidentally shoots out the window of her much loved Mercedes during a workplace hunting trip. It is very clear that Donna is never without the admiration and love of a swathe of swarthy hotties.
Best line: Oh, I love any book about vampires, werewolves, monsters, zombies, sorcerers, beasties or time-traveling romances. [Holds up a book of Twilight]
